It's over..

Goodbye my love,
Welcome my friend(:

27th Aug 2008, the date that it all started, with a simple, Good night, I love you.. on 11.56pm
has ended today. 14 Sept 2009, 4.25pm No wonder i find today's date is something weird with it.. Thought mom's birthday or something.. But couldn't be.. Mum's birthday is last month, 14th Aug. So this is it then.. And to hear it from you, on the telephone.. That you can no longer give me another chance, cause you are just being you.. I told myself, this day would come.. and when it come, just, accept it.
I know its my fault. i apologised. guess your too angry to forgive me. and so you said what you said. so let me said what i said, again. im sorry for all this while..
earlier on, was happily receiving photos from you.. and it came down to this.. i know i push it too far.. went over the limit.. and i didnt expect this outcome.. but it did happen. so let me say what i wanna say.
i really cried so hard.. eyes swollen.. i dare not see myself in the mirror. received all those photos from you.. all was so nice. really dont know which to put.. guess you made my job easier.. furthermore, earlier the day, teacher confronted regarding our studies.. both are deproving. and i know. guess it wont be any longer. you heard too much from me.. just too much words that ive hurt you deeply. i know you would leave me one day, no matter how many numerous times you said, you wont. but you havent heard this. wanted to tell you, but kept forgetting.. the only regrets, genuine regrets i have in this relationship with you, was to ever hurt you so deeply. guess never judge the day though its good at the beginning.. it doesnt always last. i love you. give me some time to let it go. to accept it. to overcome it is to accept it, so i accept it. i accept the end of our relationship. i just logged into my friendster account. just decided to delete it. theres nothing meaningful in there any longer. all our previous messages. i guess its best to leave it, remembered. now, i quite regret paying the prom night fees. asking mdm yeo can refund. seriously. k. our memories, i will always remember. never thought its this difficult to let go. how do i ever rely on myself ever again? im too reliant on you. for everything. just when everyone, in my family knew you.. its okay. so long they have good impression of you. you are a good person anyway. i knew i dont ever deserve you from the beginning. at first, i really can have a clear image of us, being together, married. have our children. happily together. but now.. gone. i thought its easy. even now, when i thought of it, tears just rolled down my cheeks. i really do want to treasure you. cherish you. be with you. nevermind. i get it. and i accept it. i really do hope you would find your happiness soon. just like how you rarely cared for me, you need not worry for me anymore. guess you wont be seeing this that soon either, Cheng Zehong. i dont know how am i gonna face tomorrow. first day without you by my side. well, its better to be loved and lost, than to have never been loved at all. im really glad, you were once mine. (:
and now ive decided to postponed deleting fs account, temporary... yay. -------
few days time, hari raya. guess i need a super recovery medicine. friends, i'm in need of you guys. please dont say, this is what ive always wanted. i dont. its so sweet, yet so bitter. its so hard to really let go.. in this relationship, ive really cared for you. dont want you to injure yourself. and when we are in arguements, or nearing to breakups, gave you chances.. but now you didnt. i guess you tolerated me too much le. ive realised. its not bout what i can give, but what can you take. im gonna cry my eyes out. and stupid, tomorrow e maths paper prelim3. ugh!

Life without you is equivalent to a body without a soul..
guess im gonna prove myself wrong.. but i still love you. my friend.
i dont wanna it end, cause seeing how others blissful with their partner, make me wanna love you more. but sometimes, we get it, sometimes we dont.
now i get it.. it aint bout how long we've been together, but how deep it is for us..
i believe in fate.. if there's fate, we'll be together again, if not.. i wish you all the very best in whatever you doing. your the first boyf to last with me over a year, to be my friend although we ended it..(:
im trying to be strong, people. it aint easy. i know you can find a better one than me..
Sigh. even faking a smile could be so difficult.. and i thought im the strong one between the two of us. heh. so my sister dream is true. lol. she dreamt that we ended because you fall for a chinese girl. but i guess reality is that we ended it so that you can find your chinese girl.. heh.
im not gonna think bout the possibility that we gonna be together again, cause i dont want to be the one to b e g for a chance.. i agreed cause i believe you would be happier without me.. and i can sense, though you dont want, you too think its the best..

i guess i gonna wash my face. and head for bed. not sure will eat till not? and study for the rest of the night. oya. i only had 1.5 hr of sleep the night before. so what do you expect?lol

ibetyoucouldbotherboutmeanymoreimcertainyournottheleastbotheredboutmeandcanconcentrateonyourtuitionimnothingbut ajinxtoyou.ineverwantedthisending.never.

alright.goodbye for now(:
image doesnt really matters now, since you are no longer in my life.. no need to look good for you, and vice versa(:im sure your happy..
Yours truly..