Ending point

I'm back into green people!(: Heh. Don't start to be curious of why i suddenly privatise my blog. Although i do know and realised that noone has been visiting.. HAHA!
Nope. There are no one in particular or anything in particular that i'm trying to hide. HA. how long can it be hidden? cause im un-privatizing it anyway also!lol.
Dont really know why i suddenly have this hyper way of blogging. seems weird to me too. like a brand new world. maybe its just a front, a cover. went to a blog i long never been to. yes, it's finally updated. not a friend, im just blog hopping. HEH.
realised that what the person went through and typed are exactly the same as mine? just that the words are more profound or that i didn't thought of. should i blog what i wanna too here? let it be seen? let it be understand by readers?but not by you?Hmms. brb.
10.31 pm. ha. back. cried when confided in mom. what mom said does make sense. but why do the heart still ache?guess i loved you too much. your sudden change within 24 hours was not anticipated. you caught me by surprise. i wrote so much in a letter, but worth it ma i show it to you. will you read and understand? hmms.
idk. really dont. maybe i give, maybe not. i want to believe so much in your words, cause it sound so good. but can i? is it sincere as you said it is.. ?can i still trust you and your words? you told me, you had your reason. i believe its rational. but is it really? or just an excuse?just like you doubt me, and my words.. this is the exact same feeling im going through..
you said it cant be the same few weeks ago.. you said you were 'dead'. i believe you now. goodbye my lover.. the one i loved, has died. im just seeing a person who resemble like him. delusional, i believe it was. it was like this one year i was having a sweet dream, but suddenly nightmare came. woke up. messed up reality with virtual world.. if only i would not wake up.. if only.. i could turn back the time, i would want to treat you better, i promise..
let it go -- for now.
however. i looked forward to 12112009. the outing i planned. hope It would be perfect. hope the one i loved, will return for a day.. for that day.
alright eyes are tired now. tomorrow chemistry remedial. paper starting on monday. damn nervous. practical.. 5 marks, kiss goodbye. hope to get 15 marks though.. sigh.

alright. guess thats that.
tomorrow lee min ho coming to singapore.. nono, hes already here. just that tomorrow he going to Etude house or something? wanted to go. noone is available.. Ha. if not i alrdy drag, ... lol.tomorrow cousin getting married or something. but i nt gg. Prepare for O lvl. meeting kenny tomorrow, i hope..

And it's somebody 19th birthday in few hours time!(:

gotta go. welcome bac, blog.
been watching transformers 1 on SCV, since i recorded it alrdy. haha. there's always the exact same part that i will sleep. and its when the autobots are fighting with the decepticons.. HA.so in love with BU M BLE B EE ...

hA. alright off now. damn packed the schedule..
nights all.(:

it's just like a rose.. so beautiful but with so many thorns that could hurt..
actions speak louder than words. i cant fulfil what i said in those posts about us.. moving on, whatsoever . i couldnt let go, just like you did.. teach me, friend?

yours truly..